Priests, Nurses, and Chlamydia

By Wolfgang Staudt from Saarbruecken, Germany (6.59 am  Uploaded by russavia)
 [CC-BY-2.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0)], via Wikimedia Commons

We attended a medical careers conference today with Elyse. One of the speakers was a nurse who wasted no time in informing the mostly college-aged audience that our region leads the state in incidence of various sexually transmitted diseases and is second in the state for incidence of teenage pregnancy.  Apparently the pregnancy statistic is cause for celebration, because last year we were in first place.

I suppose that there is something positive about maximizing the opportunity to educate young people about sexual health, but --me being me -- I couldn't help but think that what we really needed on that stage was a priest or a chastity speaker. It isn't particularly easy to tame a wildfire, and a wildfire of fornication is what we have at present in our culture. I don't suppose that words like "fornication" are given much serious thought these days, but I am inclined to call things what they are. Rules are there for a reason, are given in love, and are the sure path to health, safety, and happiness.

At any rate, as we were driving out of the University parking lot, our eighteen year old daughter said to us, "what we really needed on that stage was a priest, not a nurse." --and my mother heart smiled. Parenting pays off, and paves the way for healthy, happy families of the future.  Here's hoping some mother out there is raising a young man with the same values and beliefs.  Fingers crossed--better yet, hands folded in prayer. Whomever she is, I have been praying for her son for 18 years.

On a much lighter note, we purchased some absolutely lovely Easter laces today and some Pentecost red.  Easter veils are on the way!

Pax Christi dear ones,
~Michelle

Sex on Sunday: Premarital Relationships and Emotional Bonding

By Garry Knight from Bromley, Kent, England (In Love)
[CC-BY-SA-2.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/2.0)],
via Wikimedia Commons

Did you know?

According to Joe S. McIlhaney, Jr., M.D., and Freda Mckissic Bush, M.D., authors of Hooked: New Science on How Casual Sex is Affecting Our Children, powerful neurochemicals triggered by sex are at work in the process of emotional bonding. The release of oxytocin (for women), and vasopressin (for men), is stimulated by close physical contact and results in durable emotional ties. What's more, these chemicals don't care if the contact occurs within the context of a relationship that the participant considers valuable or long term.

Oxytocin in the neurochemical that is released during breastfeeding, and bonds a woman to her baby. That same chemical is released in women during intimate physical contact, especially sexual intercourse. The connection created tends to be long term, and to result in significant emotional pain when broken. Strikingly, oxytocin doesn't stop at emotional bonding; when a woman engages in sexual activity with a man, oxytocin also causes to have feelings of trust in him.  Again, oxytocin doesn't care if this bonding or trust is wise; it just creates it.

Francesco Hayez [Public domain], via Wikimedia Commons

Nature's system does not let men out of this double edged sword. Intimate physical contact causes the release of the neurochemical vasopressin in men. Vasopressin has remarkable structural similarity to oxytocin, and creates powerful emotional bonding of a man to his mate and their children.

These bonds are a masterful plan for creating and sustaining long term monogamous marital and parenting bonds. Simple physical contact can take part in the process of bonding of mother and father to one another, and each to their children, for a lifetime.

Those same bonds are disaster for single youth and adults who are engaging in intimate behavior, even short of sexual intercourse, with a string of partners. Not only can they cause a person to remain in a relationship that is unhealthy or potentially harmful, but they can create a series of "partial bonds" with multiple people as an individual moves from one temporary relationship to another. Further, the authors cite scientific evidence which suggests that a pattern of "hooking up" and breaking up with a string of partners may interfere with the development of brain circuits necessary for long term monogamous relationships.

The creator had a plan and produced an excellent design.  It seems best for us if we follow it.

For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh. So they are no longer two, but one flesh. ~Mark 10: 7-8

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For interested parents and others, Hooked: New Science on How Casual Sex is Affecting Our Children is a treasure trove of information regarding recent breakthroughs in the field of neuroscience, and how they can be applied to help singles and youth avoid life-changing mistakes.

Linked with: Teach me Tuesday, The Modest Mom, Domestically Divine Tuesday, Wise Woman, EOA @ Deep Roots at Home, Raising Homemakers You'll find their buttons on the Blog Hops page

Modesty, Purity, and the Tools for a Successful Marriage: A Parent's Responsibility

I checked in to Facebook today to find something discouraging.

There on my screen was one of those "bathroom mirror with my cell phone" pictures of a 17 or 18 year old girl with whom I am acquainted.

Well...the picture was actually of her, her belly button, her lower (much lower) abdomen, and the majority of one of her shoulders and upper chest area, and her "male friend" (who is apparently allowed to be alone in the bathroom with her).

Pretty discouraging.

Based on his comment on the picture, her father had seen it.  And..it was still there.


I have a myriad of reactions, but the primary ones are, how does a parent fail a child that way?  How does a child get to that place?  How does a child feel when dad allows a boy to be alone with her in a bathroom with the door closed?  How does she feel when dad knows that she chooses to dress that way, and allows it?  Does she feel free?  Lucky?  Unloved?  Unprotected?  I'm going with the last two, even if she is not aware of it yet.

Purity begins with purity of dress.  Purity of dress begins with purity of heart.  Purity of heart begins in the cradle, and it is birthed of loving, actively involved parents who "train up a child in the way (she) should go".

Parents with young children may think that this is not an issue for them yet.
It is.
Parents may think that guidelines for godly behavior with the opposite gender do not need to be addressed before the preteens.
They do.
Parents may think that a daughter does not like dad involved in her courtship activities.
She does.

Parents have a responsibility to guide and protect their children.  Protecting their purity and giving them the tools that they need to enter into, and maintain, a successful marriage is just as important as protecting them from falling off the playground equipment or running out into the street.  

Coming in at year 18 and saying, "Wow, that's a lot of skin" is not the answer.  Coming in from the beginning and saying: "God has made you special.  He loves you and values you.  He wants you to have a happy, healthy marriage.  Happy, healthy marriages are built on purity and godliness.  A young man who loves you will want to guard that purity." is.

You might also like:

Modest Dresses are Hard to Come By!

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