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Tuesday, January 10, 2012

"You're a S*xy Mama"

I went into town for a doctor appointment on Monday; Elyse was kind enough to accompany me. We have an hour drive into the city, so a companion is a blessing. She sat in the waiting room during my appointment. After the appointment, as we walked out to the parking lot, we discovered that we were both a bit miffed at the conversation we had been treated to during our respective experiences in the office.

Elyse had spent the time in the waiting room with an approximately 19 year old mother with a toddler, who had accompanied her mother (the baby's grandmother) to the office, as well. Apparently, the girl kept "encouragingly" informing the baby that she was a "s*xy mama". I'm not sure what the baby's grandmother may have thought of this, because she spoke only Spanish, and may not have known what was being said to the baby in English...but grandma's pants were pretty darn tight, so I suspect she may have approved.

Photo: Ben Cooper, click for license
I, on the other hand, spent my time with an ultrasound technician who was in her twenties. She treated me to the story of her move into the brand new home that she has purchased. Apparently, she, her eight year old daughter, and their dogs, had moved into the home the previous weekend. The home is large and unfamiliar, so her daughter was quite frightened to be alone in the various rooms of the new house. "Mom" went on to tell me that she finally had to tell the young girl to "go to her own room" because she had kicked mom's boyfriend in her sleep, while sleeping with them. Apparently, "mom" feels that the comfort of this man, to whom she is not married, is more important that her daughter's emotional well being. Apparently, she also feels that it is good practice to provide an example which suggests that shacking up with a man to whom one is not married is a wise thing to do.

I am contemplating now, whether or not it is a good thing to remain silent in these situations. It is certainly the polite and socially acceptable thing to do. But, as I look around me, I am observing a huge trend toward sexual promiscuity, having babies out of wedlock, and openly engaging in non-marital habitation in the presence of children. These things are becoming the norm. At this point, I suspect that we are no longer looking at a generation of young women who are branching out into these behaviors...but at a generation of young women who were raised by mothers who branched out into these behaviors in front of their daughters. We, as a society, have lost track of what is right and good....and of the truth that "what is right and good" is what creates healthy and happy lives for us individually and collectively.

We have gotten to the stage where we are no longer dealing with a generation of young people who are choosing not to listen to what mom and grandma told them. Now we are dealing with a generation who are doing EXACTLY what mom and grandma modeled for them to emulate.

So, do we speak up and give a contrary opinion, in hopes that a few will find their wits and start making better choices? Would it even help?  Perhaps it is because I am becoming a cranky old middle aged woman, that I would even consider such a thing?  I'm not suggesting that one be openly critical of another person.  However, sometimes a question can be asked in a conversational tone that might leave another thinking.  "Don't you worry that....?"  "Do you ever wonder whether....?"  That sort of thing.

I'm not sure what the answers to those questions are. I am interested in knowing what readers think though.  Maybe all we can do, at this stage, is set a good example for our own children, ...and pray.

How do we reach a generation that is being faced with emptiness in the wake of a society gone wacky?  How do we right the wrongs we have done them by abandoning morality and good basic social structures?

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  1. That is a tough question. I personally would speak up if I felt the Lord leading me to do so. I would not, however, speak up all on my own. I would blow it. I guess that means I need to be more sensitive to God's prompting so I don't miss the opportunity to share him.

    Thanks for making me stop a minute and think.

  2. That is a very Latino center everything around being sexy. I would let it go because it wouldn't change anything. But..I would definitely pray first because maybe God would want you to!

  3. Thank you Shanda. I did wonder whether it wasn't a matter of cultural insensitivity on our part, that led us to be bothered by this. I do think, though, that there is a bit of an epidemic of lack of basic moral standards on the part of people in their teens and twenties at this point, and it concerns me, because I'm not certain whether it is reversible once the trend continues past a couple of generations.

  4. I would like to think that speaking up would make a difference, but with the way everyone seems to believe that anything that feels right is okay, I have to wonder. It's discouraging to me to see that moral standards seem to be a thing of the past. It's definitely an epidemic, and once a generation has been raised without moral standards, how do we get it back?
    Maybe speaking up is what is needed, maybe someone out there is on the brink and hearing something might open their eyes and bring them back. In the future when confronted with such situations I am going to pray and ask God for the right words to say. Thank you Michelle, maybe if we start doing that we can start a reversal of this epidemic.


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